"The Overview"

Kevin and I had been married a little over a year when we decided it was time to start a family.  So in August of 2012, we began trying to get pregnant.  It turned out that it wasn't as easy as some people made it look.  I thought we would get pregnant within the first few months, but that was not the case.  Month after month passed us by and we were still not pregnant.  At my preconception appointment, my doctor said to come back in one year if I had not gotten pregnant yet.  So at the beginning of July 2013, I scheduled an infertility appointment for the end of July because at that point, we would have tried for exactly 12 months and still were not pregnant.

That Monday (July 29) before my appointment, I took a pregnancy test and what do you know….IM PREGNANT!  I was beyond thrilled and could not wait to tell Kevin that he was going to be a Dad.  That night, I had bought him The Expectant Father and 2 balloons.  1 balloon was shaped like a baby and the other was a heart that said "I LOVE YOU DAD."  When he arrived home from work that night, I met him at the door and told him to close his eyes because I bought him something.  I led him into the kitchen and told him to open.  He was very excited!  It finally happened! We were going to have a baby!

A few weeks later on Wednesday August 21st,  we had our first ultra sound and was going to see our sweet baby for the very first time and hear his/her heart beat.  We got in the room, the Doctor (who I had never met before) put the internal ultra sound in me and then said the words that I never thought I would hear.  "I see 2 heartbeats.  Congratulations, you are having TWINS!"  I could not believe what I was hearing and so I responded with, "I just met you.  Don't joke with me."  At that point, my jaw dropped to the floor and basically stayed there for the next 2 hours.  But the Doctor was not kidding.  The ultra sound definitely had 2 babies in there.  And to top it off, they were Identical Twins.  So we were either going to have 2 girls or 2 boys.  Identical twins are very Rare.  They are twins that are not caused by fertility drugs.  They just happen.  I pretty much told Kevin to listen to anything the Doctor had to say because I was so stunned, I wasn't comprehending anything that was coming out of her mouth.

8 weeks 4 days Gestational Age

The Doctor did mention that since we are having Identical Twins, we are considered high risk and need to be monitored by a Specialist in the Maternal Fetal Medicine Department at Riverside Hospital.  We set up an appointment with the specialist that following Thursday, August 29th.  At our first specialist appointment, they said that they monitor me mainly for Twin Twin Transfusion Syndrome.  Since my babies shared a placenta, they make sure that they are sharing the nutrients evenly and that one baby isn't growing faster than the other.  Starting at 16 weeks gestational age, they would see me every other week until the babies are born.  They said that if we were to develop TTTS then there was a laser procedure to fix it.

A month went by and on Wednesday October 16th was our next Specialist appointment.  The Doctors told us that we might be able to tell the sex of the babies at this appointment so we were very excited to see what we were going to have.  I was 16 weeks and 4 days gestational age.  They only needed to see one to know the sex of both of them.  The sonographer said "You are having two BOYS!!!"  I was shocked once again.  I seriously thought we were having girls.  We left the appointment and I have to admit, I was very scared we were having boys.  I didn't know what to do with boys.  Just as it took me a while for me to get used to the fact we were having twins, it took me just as much time to get used to the fact that we were having boys.  But after a few weeks I started to get very excited and I started to get big.

16 weeks pregnant 10/12/13

18 Weeks Pregnant 10/26/13

Every other week I got to see my babies.  I was very spoiled and I loved every second of it.  I couldn't wait to meet my sweet little boys.  The fear of raising twins had now turned into excitement.  

The day before Thanksgiving was the start of the worst months of my life.  This blog is to share the story of my journey as we got to meet our babies, Colin and Nathan far too soon and the short but very meaningful lives they had while with us here on earth.  It's not an easy story to tell as it was a million times harder to live but my babies are too sweet and precious to not share their story.